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Seventeen years of riding on a emotional roller coaster. I don't believe in fairytales anymore, so don't need for all those drama. Imm a lazy apple. I love hellokitty and inks. I hate walking too much but i love shopping. I do play online games like blacshot & auditionsea.

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Tuesday, March 29, 2011

愛你太多.

Memories. They are the only thing that remains the same, even when feelings fade, places change and everyone walks away.
Hello! I'm going to spend my day at home today again, i'm just too sick to go anywhere. Fall asleep last night while texting with bb, and my sweet bb thought i wasn't asleep but busy with other stuff. So he stayed awake till i reply his text. h3h3h3. His really my sweet silly boyf! Woke up at 8am+ and saw bb's text. replied him one text or two then fall back to sleep lol ~ Woke up at 12pm again, computer and stuff then get prepared to go to bedok hq for reporting. Reached home around 3pm+. Bb is still sleeping :( Im missing him so much uh. Shall go auditionsea to ston asap (k)

Hi babyboon (k) , I love you. It's been 28days since we've got together already! Thanks for giving in to me most of the time and tolerating my bullshits. hehehe.


@5.42pm.

Monday, March 28, 2011

You gave me an answer to all my questions.


Now i'm afraid to lost you, I need you.

Hello readers! I love spending my time with my sweet bb. Slept late last night, woke up at around 3pm+ and bb is still sleeping so didn't wanted to wake him up from his handsome dream(lol). Waited for him till 6pm+ and he still don't wana wake up :@ so wake bb up. ^^ Then computer with bb, Second Love party ! (k) Rot at audition till 3-4pm, then went to rest. Woke up at 12pm, to wake bb up ! Use computer all the way while waiting for bb to come over under my blk. My dad made my day with his stupid joke. hahahaha! Around 2pm+ , bb reach under my blk , went down to find bb and bb scare me from the back :@ Went over to minimart buy stuff and then it suddenly rain ._. , walk under the rain with bb then went to central buy stuff then cab over to luvs house. Rot at luvs house the entire day. Went down to luvs hse downstair slack with bb at around 9pm. Cab home then slack alittle while with bb under blk then hsh ! Omfg, i just love disturbing bb. His such a cute little faggot. Hehehehehe. Imm so bored while texting with bb, edit some picture. K my editing skill suck :( I got 65 questions to answer @ formspring ! (Y) Im not bullshitting i swear :@




(Click to enlarge)

@11.51pm

Saturday, March 26, 2011

Real love stories never have endings.


Hello readers! Broke up with boyf 3days ago due to some misunderstanding, but we still got back tgt like in few hours time ? ^^ k, i love my boyf, his such a sweet ass (k). Friday(25/03), went downstair blk to meet bb. Went to minimart buy some stuff then headed to blk 247 meetup with liling, reuben & reuben's sister. Slack , joke around like usual. Liling & reuben went to lp to dk do what stuff. Slack with bb alone ^^ Around 5pm+ , went to central get some stuff then cab over to lp to pick liling up and then went to luv house to slack2. Gave bb a lovebite(hehehe). Slack till 9.30pm, cab over to my house area 7-11. Bought stuffs and super funny incident happen when i'm paying for my stuff. I'd a fake cockcroach inside my wallet (used to disturb people) , so went i wana take out coins from my wallet, i accidentally took that cockcroach out and that cashier lady was like shock, wtf. Her face emotion srsly epic lah ! Can't stop laughing. Slack alittle while, bb send both me and liling home. Slept early.

Saturday(26/03), Woke up at 12pm+ , wait for liling to get prepare really super long. Around 2pm left home and headed to 230 meet jeajiunn for alittle while then bus over to whitesand, exchange some malaysia note to singapore note $.$. 58min train ride to boonlay, epic long lah :@ My sweet bb wana come over to pasir ris to fetch me then train back to boonlay, how silly uh ! But his awesome sweet (k). And a guy with his yaya papaya face flash his armpit hair infront of me and liling, and the smell really power to the mao one lah i tell you. HAHA. Reached boonlay mrt station then cab over to bb's house. Went to gekpoh shopping centre to take away macdonald to bb's blk downstair eat and slack2. Around 5pm went up to bb house, watch tv talk etc ! ^^ Went to hire cab @ 10pm+. hsh ~ Imm missing my bb so much now! His such a shy dog. LOL.

@11.57pm.

Thursday, March 24, 2011

Knowing things i don't wana know but i have to know.

Wow, it's really amazing about how much things you're hiding from me and i don't even know how should i react to all this shits now. So all the long, you were acting. You're the actor and i ain't the real actress, because i tend to expose it out in any ways. But not you, you made me think that nothing went wrong and everything is exactly what you told me. So im just naive to believe every words you say uh.

K whatever it is, It's too late to do anything already. Imm so late, i didn't even have the chance to tell you or show you how much i love you and it's gone like this..

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Can't bear to but have to.

I wana be happy too, i really wana smile again, i really wana feel your luv again. But how can i ever feel happy, how can i ever smile with you gona disappear from my life for good. I really dk if i can still feel your luv.. i really dk. Imm really very upset right now. I thought i can walk thru a longer period with you because i know nothing last. But sadly, it just not yet a month & we gotta end everything. I luv you, i really do. I wana to continue but can i ? I really can't bring myself to face you because of those words you said. I really really don't wana this to end, but i really have to bring myself to do it. Because.. i know you deserve much better. You're just too awesome and great for me. I just don't suit you. From the starting i already felt this way. Why didn't i just let it go eariler. Now it's too late really... Im hurt. Hurt so badly. Maybe when you're reading this, you've already decided to let go and never returned, but i just wana let you know. I really luv you even i know you don't.

I want the best for you. Goodbye 11th. Remember, i loved you. (k) Thanks for making me feel so loved this few days. I apperciate it alotalot really. Thanks love. You're great.

Maybe, im just used to you around me.

Hello readers! I luv my dog, boon. (k)

(taken at uss)

Im srlsy super lazy to update my site like everyday ._. so im just gona update whenever i feel like. k whatever. Slept like around 5am+, woke up @ 1pm. Went to prepared, comp alittle while & then train to macperson meet boyf. Walk like super long, finding our way to nicole darling's house. Slack2 walkwalk. Went to accompany boyf & darling to have their late lunch then headed to darling's hse watch horror movie. Hahahaha !(y) Went to mrt station to meet blended then headed to serangoon cc to sing k. Like super cheap compare to kbox. Hahaha ! Around 9pm+, went to random blk and slack. Boyf insist of sending me back to pasir ris then he train back to his hse, like sweet only. (k) Hsh around 10.35pm. :) Had so much fun la!

I really hate coming home sometimes. Getting scolded for nothing when it isn't my fucking problem. Parent's showing me attitude out of the blue with no fuck reason. :@
@11.54pm.

Saturday, March 19, 2011

Lack of sleep. Dark eyerings.

Hello reader ! (k) Im sleeping for only 2hours recently :(

18March : Slept like 7am and gotta wake up @ 9am. Tammy came over to our house, waited for me and my siblings to get prepared. Left home @ 10am. Dad send us to vivocity area to have our breakfast first before heading into USS. Went to collect our tickets and then headed to have our first ride, Cylone. Took only four rides in USS, cause we can't stop taking Cylone,Mummy and Human rides. Epic fun. We waited for 1hour30min for water ride(idk what is it call), wtf. In the end, didn't get wet but instead only my sister get wets. Rofl. Had alot fun, left USS at 7pm+ and walk to take tram back to vivocity. Walk around vivocity, Saw a hellokitty speaker for $198 and i wana get a Ladygaga earpiece for $300+, Im still considering if i should get this two :$ Hehehehe ! Went to have subway for dinner, after dinner window shop awhile and then called dad to come and pick us up. Dad came and send tammy home then hsh ~

19March : Slept like 7am + i think ? I fall asleep without knowing what time isit. Was conferencing with idiot(s) LOL. When i woke up @ 3pm +, guess what i know ? They told me i snore and they even record it. Cb's. :@ Went to get prepared and then cab over to serangoon road to meet nicole darling, she's working over at sky lan. Met up with darling, talk cock sing song. Waiting for Bapok to come over ~ Hehehehe. Not long, bapok came. Silence , was siting beside each other but we're texting. Like a fool. hehe, so after that started talking and etcetc ^^ Around 9pm+ cab back to my house area, slack alittle while then bapok send me home (k). Hsh. Bapok is sleep like a pig now comfirm ! :@ Hahaha.

@11.23pm.

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Fever.

Hello readers! Imm so lazy to update my site. :(

Luvs hse, out with family or home. That's what i've been doing the past few days ! Gona do a proper post tmr. Imm so sick now ! K bai.

I got a dog, Boon ! (k)

Sunday, March 13, 2011

I'm sorry for not being able to be the perfect one.

Hello readers! Sorry for not updating yesterday due to lazyness !(Y) Short & quick post for today !

12March: Slept like 7am+ , woke up @ 3pm by luvs. Imm late to meet him ~ Hurried prepared and then bought my late lunch over to his house and eat instead. Slack2, chitchat etc. Had a little arguement with luv .__. . Around 8pm+ , cab over to Tessie chalet's to meet xiaopang & co. Had fun chatting, talking cock and stuff ~ Reached home around 12am.

13March: Slept like 8am+ , conferencing as usual. (k) Woke up at 7pm. HAHAHA. Imm just gona spend my everyday like this already ! ^^ Other than meeting luvs, i think im just gona stay at home till someone ask me out ! Imm just to lazy to ask people out anymore ._. Imm gona auditionseaa after posting for bapok. :D

Hi, i luv my bapok. His a sensitive creature ! (k)(k)

@8.19pm.

Friday, March 11, 2011

Forget the forgotten.

Hello readers! Immm so hyperactive this few days. (Y) hiakhiak.



K, finally it's gona be a proper post after dk how many days after not updating my site. :3
10March : Woke up @ 2pm+ , prepare and stuff. Went to central and bus over to ws to meet fella & ross. Headed to library and do mimi's birthday card while waiting for dewi to come. Dewi & boyf came. Headed to downtown and settle our dinner there. Around 6.30pm, cab over to luvs house. Skip cut cake session with babygirls, imm sorry :( Chitchat with luvs and stuff.~ Hsh around 10pm+.

11March : Slept like 8am+ ? conference & texting ! (Y) Woke up like 6 - 7 pm, surprisingly daddy didn't nag at me ! Hahahaha, my mum ask me do i look like a human now. LOL. K lah, their motive is they dw me to go out thats why they didnt wake me up ! Wtff. kkkkk, going to msn / auditionsea ! (K)

I luv you, cheebong ! :D

@11.50pm.

Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Another false fairytale story.




Thanks for teaching me not to believe in luv, i'm just a burden.
I lost my confidence, i can't find any topic to talk to you anymore.
.
Hahahaha.. Watch and see ! I believe imm gona be able to overcome this nightmare asap ! Imm a super woman ~ I can do it ! Please be happy for me and for yourself. Haha.... I luv you cheebong. I really do. :)
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Tuesday, March 8, 2011

I'm sorry that i loved you.

Just let me speak the last words and i promise i'll leave with no regrets.
(This post isn't really a important one, so don't have to waste your time reading if it doesn't corcern you,Sorry. just ranting my feelings.)



One of our epic conversation ! (K)
(click to enlarge)
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I'm starting to get paranoid easily because i don't wana lose you without knowing. I can't really tell you how i felt inside but i really wish you didn't left or maybe all this thing didn't happen at all. And we're still quarreling every second that kind of relationship. I failed to act dumb, i lost control and eventually rant everything to you about how jealous i am and etc. You told me you love me, and you said you're born to love me yet the very next day you're saying goodbye to me. I don't know what the fuck went wrong, or maybe should i say you finally realise who you really wants.(Since it's actually the both of us) At the starting, when i knew abt it i kept on pushing you away because i can sense happiness whenever you spoke to her.(dont deny this fact) and you really enjoy speaking to her.(Which is now the fact that you're showing me).

Last night, was craps. I was just jealous , so so so so so jealous. I know she's joking but fuck, im still jealous. Imm just trying to get back to you. And sad thing to hear was, your feeling faded before asking what the fuck i did that for. So now i know how much is your luv for me. I made the wrong step, i should have just confess to you how jealous i was. But why can't you just sense or see i'd turn moodless. You've been wispering to her , ain't you ? :) Arghhhhh, FUCKFUCKFUCKFUCK! :@

I knew you on the 02 March thru a conference at night. Texted you with my number at 5.51am, and we started our conversation and didn't stop ever since 02march. First impression of you was... you're super unfriendly & anti-social. You just don't seems to really like talking much to new people. You ss-ed a picture trying to show me my name with a alibaba emoji. And also from that day started, i think you're interested in *her. I confronted you, you told me you didn't, you treated her that way because she owe's you something. You said the way i text is super fast and that's our first arguement about who texted faster.

I late replied your text for fucking long on the 03March. And when i replied you, your reaction was " lol? WTF, so long ago LOL." and you told me you were having moodswing but you ain't willing to tell me whats the reason because you doesn't know why either. And we chatted about iphone jailbreak topic. Eventually, we started to hit off we started to joke around and i no longer feel you doesn't wana speak to me (Y) Oh hahaha ! And i send you my middle finger picture ! That's the very first pictureeeeee i mms-ed you ! We started mms each other pictures of ourself & nonsense pix. (LOL) And you scolded me a noob because i doesn't know where to change the fake operator thingy and you mms me the way ~ ^^ And thats when you started calling me hantu ! (K)

Hahaahah! On the 04March, you kept asking me abt her and i was like "Fck lah, i look like her mother ah, keep herherher." And you said it was MOMO DE AI , because i insist of giving you her contact but you doesn't want it . It's also the first time we solo talk to each other ~~~~~~~~ on the phone ! :):) We hanged the phone around 6.33am. Hahaha, we argure half way and i fall asleep and you thought i was emo-ing ~ And you sent me three text scolding me ! (Y) The next day, you send me a goodmorning with _l_. What a good morning. HAHA. I complain about how often you used the toilet and you said there's no wrong in it. lol~ Another arguement ~ I bored outside so decided to text you, i was at farmway that day and you said im gona fall into the pond and the prawns are gona poke me. :@:@ And you curse me to get alot of mosquito bites. What a meanie person are you uh ! Haha.. We started the 3Pack for $2 thingy because you said you were sad. LOL. And you said what else am i capable of excludding bullying you. (That is loving you !) You mention that you & her have no fate and i just suddenly have this soursour feeling whenever you mention her.

On the 05March, we started argueing abt fucking ourself with legs chair / bananas or whatever. HAHA. Epic joke. And once again, you're telling me abt you & her arguement at fb. I told you i ain't bullying you infact im actually entertaining you and you said it is kinda entertaining and you thanked me ! (Y) Ohhhhhh, you claim that im your "Kaobai" Match ! Because we luv kaobai-ing each other without fail . We started chatting abt my previous ex cpl ~ And his dam fail, rememeber ?! ^^ I told you i broke off with him and you said i'm such a bad person. Told you that his a super sensitive person and you said that if you were my boyf you will be super jealous too. Cause i buay zi dong! :@:@ We argue argue argue and argue. We can even argue about the song we're listerning ._. HAHA, You kup my phone and i was pissed. You promised me you won't kup my phone anymore. Butttttttttttt , i can't get pissed with you for long ~ So i told you i was joking and you said im cheating your feeling :@ Hahaha, You late replied my text and you was so ji dong and can't stop apologizing to me :$ AND YOU SAY YOU WOULD CPL ME IF I GO AUDITION TO ACCOMPANY YOU! (Y) hahahaha, but we all know it was a joke, so clever me didn't went (Y)

On the same day,05march. You kept on apologizing to me non-stop for nothing. I don't what's wrong with you and im so fucking pissed off with you apologizing to me. :@ You said you apologise cause you were shag. No link but yeah you still dont wana tell me whats the reason why you're shag. So didn't really continue asking you whats wrong. Accompanied you audi, and fuck i dc-ed & You claim that i lied to you about my internet connection lost :( Hahaha... You srsly can't stop apologizing to me that day... " Sorry sara, wo bu shi gu yi de :( Sorry. Dui bu qi " And i was like , wtf went wrong ? But not long, we started to argue again ._.

06March, you told me you were busy liking her fb comments. And dam ~ That feeling came again. Argueeeee as usual, Skipskip.

07March, A day when i finally realise i'd already fallen for you , Because of rm 1. That feeling was super...... epic. I jitao no mood ~ & that day that we confessed our feeling out. You took a really long time to do so, and i already knew what are you gona say ._. And you were texting me with alot of vinegar because i was conferencing that day (Y) And you scolded me for posting dumb post and ask me to go to bed cause it's 6am already. The way we're talking is getting so weird after since we confessed. Because of those dumb post im posting , you told me that all this confess thingy was a joke. I break down immediately. So i didn't really wana show out my emotions , so i act as if i don't give a fuck. And we continue argueing. Hahaha, we added each other on msn on this day itself too ~ So fun chatting. We stopped texting and i texted you first eventually ._________. And you said you were waiting for my text (Y) Argh, happy max. You said you did left me a offline message on my msn , but i didn;t recieved it :( You're begging me to online !! hahahaha \m/ You said you're jealous !!!!!!! omfg, you're jealous because of me ! Hehehehehe !

08March, Our one day fairytale story ~ ^^ We were super effing sweeeeeet. Feel so loved by you, and i srsly love you. And you gave me a new name with alot emoji with it ! And your fake operator !!! (L)Sara.thhantu! Hahaha :$ You claim that only a few of your contacts have emoji at the side of their name , didn't believed and you ss-ed for me to see. You can't stop explaining abt those people with emoji by the side of their name, like a cute . :$ And you say you have to explain first or else im gona ignore you ~ Hello ! Im not so sensitive ok !! I really luv it when you said " luvluv you " or " luvyou lah cheebong " ! Hahaha.. We started mms-ing each other about who we're contacting and what are the details we are talking. Ohya, we had the same battary when we mms each other those pic ! (Y) Okay, imm gona skip those part because we're just argue-ing ._. Yah, and that's how we commiunicate by argue-ing ! :D You told me you were upset and somethings i did. I'm sorry that i hurt you :( That's the fucking first time you send me a fucking long goodnight message and thats the fucking last time uh ~

On the 9th march, midnight. Our fairytale story is about to end already, we didn't confront neither did we confessed. We both just acted dumb and hoping things to be alright. Unfortunetly , it didnt work out. It still ended. You and her happiness ~ I can see it. Goodluck & all the best.

I'm sorry, i no longer have the rights or ability to tell you i love you. Sigh, i just hate being treated like you don't even care. if you really don't care then just tell me. No matter how harsh it could be,i'll just accept it. I guess i can no longer bring back your heart. Let's just remain as what it is then. I'd cried the whole night, Im so fucking tired yet i wake up every 3hours just to check my phone, and also awake from nightmares. Whenever i close my eye, images of you & her just never fail to pop up.. So hurting. Hahaah! It isn't your problem, guess its just mine own problem. I'll learn to let go eventually ~ Hohoho. Awesome 1day fairytale ! (Y)

Hantu wants bapok to know, hantu really loved him.

Just to lazy.

Hello readers! I've been updating my site, because...Shown on my post tittle (Y)

Short & quick post, i've either be staying at home or meeing luvs @ tamp. Sleeping at around 6am+ in the morning then waking up around1pm+. This is my daily rountine already lah ! (Y) k byebye, imm gona audition sooon ! :D:D

@11.11pm - So i was just dreaming all the long.

Friday, March 4, 2011

Sour feelings.

Hello readers ! I finally met an idiot that i've been looking forward to meet.


Fall asleep while texting around 5am+, Woke up at 2pm+. Went to get prepared then went to meet jeajiunn for alittle while then cab over to luvs house slack alittle while. Cab to farmway with luvs & co. Met Anna sissydar & co. They left after that, chitchatted with jinfeng that idiot(Mention at the top) Had fun chitchat talking with him & weizhe. After that, rounding with luvs and chitchat. Hsh around 10pm+. Sorry theodora precious & Huishan for not meeting you girls today :(

They doesn't need me anymore, but they doesn't know that i still need them. So much that we've been thru, those times we had, vanished just like that and it's no longer gona happen again. I shouldn't be thinking so much already, since things have already reached this kind of stages that nothing we could do to rewind back to the past then i shall just let it be. Stop yearning for the past, be happy about what i've currently. I miss you girls, i really do.. :(

@11.50pm.

Thursday, March 3, 2011

我很累.

Hello readers! Sometimes, the person who tries to keep everyone happy is always the most lonely person, so never leave them alone because they will never say that they need you.



I lost to myself in my own game.
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02March : Slept like 7am, then woke up around 1pm+. Prepared and stuff, wait for liling to come home and get prepared. Headed to bugis street and bugis junction to shop with mummy. Shop for two bottom & 1 top. (Y) hehehe, went to have dinner at bugis junction basement. After dinner, cab home. Once reached home, called dad to bring me to tpy to jailbreak my phone ! :D Siblings wants to jailbreak too, so went tgt. Jail break was super fun at the same time stress abt what fonts what theme is nicer etc ~ Thanks daddy and mummy for not complaining abt how we bomb your pockets.
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03Marchs : Slept like 7am again ~ Busy texting with idiots and hantu's. (LOL) Woke up at 1pm+, have to go reporting. Prepared and then waited for dad to send me to bedok hq. Went to report, and had urine tested. Spend like 2hours + inside cnb and poor daddy is waiting for me outside don't know what the fck am i doing inside cnb for so long. :( So daddy came in to cnb office to look for me, IO start to hurry settle my stuff. ._. About 5-10mins after daddy came in, can go home already. Obviously she's taking her sweet time before daddy came in !!! :@ Reached home around 5pm, went down to meet huishan, chitchat with her then went to meet theodora precious, junkai & jeajiunn under theodora blk. Slack2, Jeajiunn left followed by junkai. Went to huishan house to take her wallet then went to shop for huishan's f&n stuffs. Headed to blk 446 slack alittle while, hsh ! Currently chatting on fb with my baichi erzi and imm so gona audi sooon! Haven't been playing blackshot le :(


@11.45pm.

Tuesday, March 1, 2011

It's been such a long time.

Hello readers! Imm having so much fun today !


Time passes very quickly when you're having fun.
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Slept like 6am+, was gaming while conferencing. Woke up @ 1pm+ , prepared and waited for daddy to send me to bedok hq for reporting (Im srsly lack of sleep, and i srsly hate tuesday& thursday cause i can never sleep enough! :@) After reporting, wana go shopping with mummy, but mummy is too lazy. So went to meet pel instead. Went to pel house meet her and julia'ku. Talk alittle while waiting for pel to get prepared. Walked to ehub, bought movie ticket. Wanted to watch ''My ex lover'' but wasn't showing already have to wait for 3rd march. Was suppose to watch ''I am number four'' but didn't watch it either... so we caught.....

'' No string attached! "
ahahaha! Surprisingly we manage to get thru it. (Y) Watched 5pm show, Rate it 4/5. After movie, went to the dk what taiwan thingy and settle our dinner there. After that , headed to lan, played for 2hours. Had so much fun playing auditionsea with pel. Talking cock and stuffs with friends. After that , slack alittle while. Went to handicap toilet and there's this guy trying to open the door, so i shouted 'fuckyou' cause i thought was pel. After that, went out of the toilet and pel show me whose that guy, he can't stop smiling to himself. Was really laughing like crazy with pel. HAHA. K its not funny,but funny for me. LOL. Walk pel home & then slowly walk home. Hsh around 10pm+. Tomorrow shopping with mummy ! Excited max. ^^ New cloths is coming into my cardbored. Muhahahaha. K baibai, wana play some games nao.
@11.26pm.